With a due date quickly approaching, everyone is super excited and can hardly wait to meet that adorable new baby. All your friends and family will want to visit ASAP, which can be a bit overwhelming for new parents. Remember you have control over who visits your little one and when, especially in those first few weeks. Here are some tips to help manage those well-meaning visitors!

 Set rules:

Make a set of rules you want guests to obey when visiting. This sounds a little harsh but these rules will help you set boundaries for visitors and gives them a heads up on what to expect. Having rules will make it easier for you to make a choice of who should visit in those early days of exhaustion and who should probably wait a little while longer.

 Some examples would be: 

• Set a time limit for how long they can stay. This is very important if you are trying to keep baby on a schedule. Also this can help both them and you know when the visit will be over. Make sure that you let any visitors know when naptime, feeding, etc. takes place.
• If or when they can post about the baby on social media. When the baby first comes you probably won’t want someone to post about your little one before you get a chance. Another reason to consider this rule is if you don’t want to have pictures on social yet, privacy is important for everyone and yours and your baby’s should be respected. Make a point to tell guests that you have no problem with them taking photos as long as they will not post them online.
• Reminding them if they have been around someone sick or are sick to please stay away. Babies immune systems are very strong and you don’t need to risk their health, no one wants a sick baby. Just kindly ask them not to come. (This should be common sense but you never know! Everyone is just so excited to see baby they can’t wait!)
• Lastly, they are your rules and you can change them whenever, and for whomever you want. You don’t have to feel like you need to explain yourself to anyone. If you aren’t feeling up for visitors that day you owe no one an explanation as to why!

Determine who can visit:

This is very important for right after a hospital or home birth. Entertaining guests can be stressful and after you just gave birth odds are you would rather not play hostess. When you are determining who will come visit think of the rules you set, will that person respect your wishes? If not it is probably best to tell them they need to wait. Try to invite people that will help with the baby and that you are most comfortable with. You will likely be a sleep deprived, emotional mess so the more comfortable you are with your visitors the better.

Create a schedule:

After baby is born scheduling is your best friend. You will do everything for baby on a schedule, sleep, eat and play, so why not create a schedule for visiting. The goal here is to have people come over when the baby is typically awake to prevent guests from doing what will drive any parent crazy - waking the baby. Inform your guests that while you enjoy them visiting, interaction with the baby can only be during certain times to keep the baby on schedule. They should be understanding (and if they’re not it’s not your problem!). In the weeks that follow you may want to adjust when people can visit based on what you feel up for, don’t be afraid to cancel plans once in a while, you need a little break too.

Ask for help:

If someone is coming to visit - especially grandma - ask for help. Ask them to bring something you might need or ask if they can entertain the baby while you do a couple small things (i.e. shower, nap, sit by yourself in the quiet). Never be afraid to ask for help, most people want to help but aren’t sure what they can do or what you’re comfortable with them doing. Don’t forget to take care of yourself now and then! Happy mama means happy baby!

Communication:

Communication is the key for everything! With your significant other, be sure to communicate who you feel comfortable to come around in the first few weeks of your little one’s life and what rules you want to set for those guests. Make sure both of you agree on who can come visit and when. Be upfront with guests about your expectations for them, let them know what you might expect from them and don’t assume they know. Inform your guests if you do not want surprise visits or if you truly aren’t up for company. Be honest with everyone to save yourself the stress of having to do too much. 

Remember, that sweet baby is going to bring so much joy into so many people’s lives, but don’t let them impede on your moments. Spend all the time you want bonding and enjoying these first few weeks because sadly they always end up going way too fast.